We are now heading toward our fourth year in business and we are doing great and are on the right track. It hasn’t been easy. I have struggled financially, mentally, and emotionally. I have seen amazing successes and I have felt defeat.
I work at this job 24/7, and yes even in my sleep. I dream it, I live it, I breath it. It’s all I think about. It’s all I want to be doing with my time.
This last week has been so hard and I am not sure why. At the beginning of the week I was turned down for a job I really wanted to get which kind of set off my week I’m sure. And you know I didn’t even have my hopes up about this particular event. I just knew I could do it over the top and totally blow my client’s expectations out of the water. I am mad at myself for not having presented better and even more mad at myself for sharing amazing ideas that I know some other event planner is going to get to play out now.
But in this same week of frustration I have also secured two events and I am pretty sure I will have some huge news to share shortly as well. Those are amazing things that I should be so excited about. But for some reason this week I am just not my usual positive self so I am not over the moon like I usually am.
I will tell you, I am so grateful for my new found group of business friends. God I love them. I love having people I can talk to about my business successes and sorrows and have them understand exactly how I am feeling. I was able to talk with a few of them tonight and I feel much better because they reminded me that I am normal and that what I am working for is so worth it.
I have to remember that even 10 years into my company I will be still having weeks like this because nothing is perfect. And these weeks challenge me to be better. When I stop wanting to get through these weeks then I will know that I have found the end of this journey in my life and it will be time to move on to something new.
But for right now I am here for the long haul and one of these days I am going to get the big break I have been waiting for and working for. But then again, will I see it when it comes or will I still be looking for something even bigger. Well, guess I have some more thinking to do now.